第三句in this vacation改為during this vacation。
第四句except wanting work hard改為besides working hard on my study; 後面的部分加上to改為I want to go to Qingdao to visit my sister(確認壹下，妳要拜訪的是親生姐妹嗎？如果不是，而是表姐妹、堂姐妹的話，應該是cousin)。
第五句I'm going to visit the interesting places in Qingdao, and enjoy local snacks。
第六句I'll also go to look at the sea。
第七八句合並為I like the sea very much, and I like reading books,too.
第九句in改為during。
第十句十壹句改為It's going to be a wonderful vacation, I can't wait for it to come.
第二篇I don't hope to ill.I hope my family in good health next year.I want to get more and more pocket money.If it can come true,I will happy.In the new year.I want to get good firend ship改為
I don't want to be sick.I hope my family will be in good health next year.I want to get a better amount of pocket money.If it can come true,I will be very happy. In the new year, I want to make some good firends.
第三段There is a lot of famous spot in Jinan 改為
There are a lot of famous spots in Jinan.
Beacause Jinan has too much water,
It has“the spring city”改為
Beacause Jinan has so much spring water,
it is called“the spring city”.
If you come,you can like them too.改為
If you come and visit, you'll like them too.